Oyime's Musings

I was at the salon a few days ago minding my business and I couldn't help but overhear the conversation this woman was having with ...well everybody.

She's one of those people that love to gist and she was talking throughout the time her hair was getting done. I wasn't that surprised when she started talking about domestic violence but what surprised me was the story she told so passionately. 

Apparently her friend's husband was always beating her up and she ended up in the hospital every time. She then exclaimed that she had to ask her friend "Must you talk???" and when her friend told her she should be allowed to speak her mind she responded with "If you like keep talking next time you may not come back from the hospital". 

The 16 year old girl who was also there then said she doesn't understand why women have to talk when their husbands are angry.

I don't know why I was surprised at what I was hearing. This seems to be the way so many women think but to hear them blame a woman for getting beaten up and say absolutely nothing about the man doing this just made me feel sad for the women who are experiencing this and being told that they're the ones that need to change. After this they started talking about husbands cheating but that's a story for another day. 

I can understand how hard it is to leave an abusive relationship especially here in Nigeria where you would be told to try not to upset your husband so much. I hope that in a few years more women can be told that getting beaten is not their fault and the women going through this can believe this and the strength to leave.